A Female Ally

You all know of the struggles I have had with my wife. But I haven't written much about her sister. This sister, to review, has known of my crossdressing since I told my wife over twenty years ago. I didn't learn that my secret had been shared until last November. There was never even a hint in the way I was treated that I was a known quantity. Pretty amazing in itself.

So, I arranged to talk with "D" just before Thanksgiving. We met at a restaurant one evening and talked over an appetizer and coffee for over two hours. She shared what she already knew, and I filled in a lot of the blanks. I wanted to get her take on my feelings, and my wife's, as an outsider.

She sympathizes a lot with both of us. She knows how hard it is for my wife, wondering if she'll one day find herself living with a woman. I told D that the likelihood of me transitioning is near zero. This wasn't what my wife had led her to believe. I'm just trying to find a plateau that I can live with.

Her take on me was more interesting. She said that everyone is in drag. We all create an image that we want others to accept. She said that she would not be treating me any differently if I were presenting as a woman. She wouldn't care. That said, she told me that I'd better be fully prepared to be completely out, if I thought that I could be out and about in any limited public manner as Leslie, particularly in my hometown. Running into the wrong person is all it takes to turn your world upside down. It was a very pleasant talk, unlike any that I'd had with my wife on the subject. We ended with me telling her how I'd always admired her sense of fashion, what a great look she has. She gave me a big hug and thanked me.

Sunday night, my wife's family got together for Mother's Day. I got a chance to talk to D alone for a few minutes. I told her that I would love to go shopping with her, as she finds the best stuff at Goodwill for next to nothing. She said she'd love to do that. She wondered if my wife would consider that to be enabling me. I agreed that it was a strong possibility. But, she said, if you're going to buy stuff anyway, it would be much better not to throw away money on bad choices, to stay on a tighter budget. She talked some about the many Goodwill stores in the area, which she liked and which she didn't. Quite the connisseur. She was very positive about the idea, and isn't at all weirded out talking about my predilections.

So, now the hard part. Run it up the flagpole at home, and see if the missus salutes. At least now, I feel that D will go to bat for me if the initial response is negative. Having someone knowledgeable and stylish to shop with would be a great boon.

Oh, a followup. I decided to take off the polish on my toes for the weekend. I just couldn't imagine keeping my feet covered for two days. But tonight, I painted them again for the week. Thanks to Caroline for suggesting a neutral shade. I borrowed my daughter's very sheer light pink polish. It's shiny, but pretty much the same shade as my toenails. I love it!